morning wonders

i got up this morning at 5 to go to the airport, and then couldn't really sleep so I went directly to work. but even at 6:30, you have the early birds running along mem drive. sometimes i wonder, what's so appealing about running in the morning? i feel perfectly fine running at 2 pm, and might even prefer it because the warmth makes me sweat more. is it the chilly morning air that people enjoy? or just having an early start? i'm not sure. but other wonders of being up early is not only you get to be in an empty office much longer than usual, but little things, like how the water fountain stays steady in the morning because the water pressure is still stable, i assume. next time i come in early, i'll be sure to enjoy the steady pressure in the fountain, and maybe i'll even try to be the first to use one of the urinals.

elfquest

i'm not a big old comics fan but apparently elfquest was a big thing in the 80s, and once i found the digital version online i've been addicted. i even got some elfquest books from the great lincoln book drive.

and it's a cute little epic comic. the characters look pretty old school and there are some times you can definitely see the influence of 70's flare pants and disco hair. the plot is gripping but still lighthearted, with none of the bitterness that pervades today's epics. (think simplicity, like voltron or transformers, instead of cowboy bebop.)

but then i get to the "dance" of the mountain elves. and guess what - "quietly an elven youth herds all the children upstairs. 'we haven't earned the right to stay. we'll get our turn someday.'" and then they go full out into orgy mode:



how could i ever think that a 70's comic based on elves could be innocent???

and then i realized

they turned on the weather machine!!! it's cpw and as i skated home there were all these prefrosh walking around, not appreciating the nice weather. it's uncanny how the big green building weather ball can be used to manipulate the weather. the only time i can remember was last year, when it was rainy and somewhat cold. but for the past five years, it's always been like freezing or rainy all week before cpw, then sunny and 70 that weekend. and as soon as the potentials leave, back to bleak weather.

spring

today is a glorious day. i looked at the weather and it was 67. this is coming from days of sub 40 weather in april, and suddenly the sky's blue and sunny and there's a warm breeze.

i went rollerblading in lexington during lunch, and it was like summer. a cool, breezy woodsy summer, not those hot humid boston downtown summers. and i discovered some new things in lexington that i didn't know were there - a paved bike trail that cuts through the woods, apparently straight to cambridge (~15 miles or so), and a huge "lexington compost center" right beside it. so aside from having to go a mile or so on a narrow, crunchy bike lane beside a two lane highway, having to skate through basically bogs and compost smelling semi-industrial terrain, it was like a stroll in the park.

doesn't matter though, because it's gorgeous outside, and it's so close to staying spring you can feel it. maybe a change of weather will also influence those guys on wall street to feel less negative...if they can actually look out the windows once a while from the floor.

losing hope

what's the feeling when your parents finally lose all hope in you for greatness? i think it's probably the most depressing thing to hear your mother say "i guess i have to accept that you're not going to achieve anything great. it's easier to bear if i give up." and you have to wonder, am i really that much of a failure that my own mother has accepted living out the rest of her life in depression? is it my fault, or the fault of her fucking chinese friends who love to gossip and compare the achievements of their children, who sell out to wallstreet? part of me thinks that this should make me mad, and i should rebel against her hopelessness, get into harvard just to "show her". and part of me wonders why it ever could have happened.