yo yo dieting

maybe i'm a big wuss but dieting sucks. and tonight i had a combination of dehydration, some sort of stomach ailment, and too much celery for lunch. i'd burp or cough and something i ate for dinner smelled on my breath. the funny thing is it smelled kind of like weed, and i thought steve had been smoking. i wonder if my lettuce went bad? because i only had a ham and lettuce and tomato sandwich.

but i weighed myself after workout, and i was down to 134.8 lbs. that's kind of ridiculous, given i only need to be at 136.6 on SATURDAY. well no wonder i cramped up and was faint and couldn't even count to 10 at the end of class. but then again, that's only 3 lbs of water, which is normal for some people, so maybe i'm just a big wuss.

this weekend is UCSD's end of the year banquet. i helped mike work on some videos, glory helped me with some stuff that's still a secret, and there are many others working behind the scenes to get everything done. of course i'm really sad that i won't be there this saturday because i'll be at the fresno qualifiers.

in a way this qualifier means a lot to me, because it's the last one before nationals. nathan and i are going to try to join the rest of our crew in being qualified and being allowed to fight on the world class division rather than the elite open. it's kind of like i've been working up to this one, right? portland, collegiates, kansas city. so this is the one i'll gun for. master baik said that i should want it most. i should get angry in the ring because i've worked so hard for it. and i used to get angry, or excited, and even cocky. i've lost some of that edge, and maybe that's why i've been less successful. part of me feels that i'm wiser, and cooler, and more at peace with the world. but the other part of me wants it so bad that i'm willing to knock someone out.

but mostly, i just want to stop yo yo dieting. that burrito sounds might good right about now. oh wait, that's part of the reason yo yo dieting happens.